Five things never to say to someone who has just lost their job

“This is the new chapter you’ve been waiting for.” Really?

“You’re going to be fine. I’m not worried about you.” I'm not fine.

“At least you’ll get EI and can relax for a few months.” Relaxing is the last thing on my mind.

“You should build an online course with all the free time you’ll have.” What???

“You’ll be back on your feet in no time, so you won’t burn through too much savings.” You have no idea about my finances.

None of the above statements, or any modest riff on them, are OK to say to someone who has just lost their job. The only response that works, and will ensure you can maintain your relationship, is this: “I’m so sorry this happened to you. Let me buy you a coffee so we can chat more.”

Thousands of Canadians are finding themselves laid off and experiencing total system shock. If you find yourself out of work (or know someone who’s been let go) implement these practical steps to help protect your mental well-being and finances.

It feels raw, traumatic and unfair, so get support

Take a few days to just sit with this change. When you are able, reach out to friends, family or your therapist for healthy support. If you have someone in your life who’s being insensitive about your job loss, put some space between the two of you. Incorporating physical activity into your days can help restore a sense of order and assist in managing the stress of losing you job.

Get your paperwork in order

Carefully read over the package of documents that you received from your employer when you were let go.

It should include a letter explaining the rationale for the layoff like restructuring, economic circumstances, relocations, mergers, buyouts, termination with cause (or not) and so on. If you’re interviewing for new jobs soon, you might need this letter to prove what exactly happened with your termination.

Have an employment lawyer review your severance package (if you were offered one) before signing anything. This professional may find an opportunity for negotiation, or quickly determine that the package is fair. If you weren’t offered anything, and feel you should have been, get this lawyer working on your file immediately. Seek immediate legal counsel if you feel you were inappropriately targeted for a layoff or your labour or human rights were violated. If you simply can’t afford a lawyer, investigate legal aid organizations near you.

Your paperwork should also include details on what happens to your benefits coverage now that you’re laid off. Sometimes there are options to extend benefits, other times coverage simply ends abruptly, and you’ll want to consider securing independent coverage for health, dental, life or critical illness.

Reduce your costs to essentials only and explore Employment Insurance (EI)

You don’t need to list your car for sale just yet. You do need to quickly shift into waste-nothing mode. Cut out costs that are not critical to meeting your immediate needs. Deep dive into your budget. Clear up any high-interest credit card debt and postpone any and all major purchases like home renovations, memberships or vacations.

Depending on how long you worked for your employer, and the circumstances surrounding why you were let go, you might be eligible for EI. Visit the Employment Insurance benefits website to start your EI application — you will need to have a copy of your Record of Employment (ROE). Sometimes employers file ROEs electronically; other times, they are mailed. EI payments are taxable and are paid to you while you are unemployed for a set period of time. You can see how EI payments are calculated at Canada.ca.

Prepare to take action on your pension

Do you have to transfer money out of a pension plan and to a different financial institution? How quickly must you take action? Are there penalties for transferring the money out of the current provider? Meet with your financial adviser to carefully review what needs to be done with your work savings plans, if anything.

Now that the practical parts around being let go are rolling along, you can come up with a plan to get back to work, on your terms. Refresh your resumé and cover letter, and update your LinkedIn profile. Use the power of AI to ensure these key documents, and your profile, have keywords that can be picked up by any applicant tracking systems, and paired with the job descriptions that you want to go after.

Be kind to yourself. You’ll need positive emotional energy to get through this difficult time.

This article was originally published in The Star. Lesley-Anne Scorgie is a Toronto-based personal finance columnist and a freelance contributing columnist for the Star.